Telling Our Stories.


What a way to come back to my blog. After an absence of two months and some drafts saved for future publication, I write to seek funds for my short film. I have never spoken about my work directly on this blog because I thought it not a good mix, my personal opinion on things and producing a radio show that necessarily has to be balanced and fair (HAHAHAHA *wink*). Also I am not quite sure how many people read my blog. To me it is a self-indulgent exercise to improve my writing. Perhaps others see it differently. So here goes.

I have just written and produced the short film Kimbap. This is a story about a migrant Korean family, a goose family that lives in Auckland, New Zealand and how their fragile existence is shattered by a neighbour. Kimbap is a story of isolation, loneliness, food, culture and inclusion.

I am often asked why, as an Indian, I felt the need to write a Korean story. First of all human emotions do not have a culture, colour or religion. It is how we react to situations that differs from place to place. Loneliness and isolation, the need to give your children a better education are not feelings and notions that belong to any single type of person or culture. Migrant experiences overlap including the need for cultural maintenance, to cook your native foods at home and to make the best of any situation. (To put it simplistically.)

Secondly, I see myself as a transculturalist; a polycultural person who lives in a global world. So wherever I am, the struggles, stories and histories of those people become my own. I live with the uneasiness of my multiple identities and participate actively in that civil society. It is not a separate, ‘Indian’ existence dissociated from others and only having an equation with the dominant host society.

Thirdly, purely from a business point-of-view, it is foolish to tell only ‘Indian’ stories. How limiting! I will do what gives me a cross-cultural audience that broadens discourse. Hence this ”Korean’ story.

I could go on but would rather my readers gave me money and shared the campaign page with their networks. I have also created a Facebook fan page that has photos, a synopsis, a crew list etc. For me this is a grassroots project that should show the power of the community instead of constantly seeking funds from the government as we tend to do in New Zealand. Besides this is a global story. So whoever is reading out there, donate and share. 🙂 ❤


Charity as hypocrisy. Best of all the little Youtube video visualising the wisdoms of Slavoj Zizek. Read and watch. Very connected to the latest Indian fad of ‘activism as fashion’.

torontoisacontinent's avatarAfrica is a Country (Old Site)

By Melissa Levin

What is it with the conviction, held primarily in the West, that you can save yourself and the world (well, usually Africans) by shopping? Last week the tony Canadian chain, Holt Renfrew, began selling “the bag that can change the world.” For just $50, consumers can purchase a Tory Burch designed sack, some of the proceeds of which will go to feeding hungry African children. Feeding hungry children, wherever they may be, is a noble cause. But the persistence in undergirding a system that starves them in the first place detracts from the gesture.

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This is a new blog I am following and find the posts incredibly interesting. I would have thought that a blog about Africa would be mostly about African identity and discourse, something of which I have very little knowledge. My bad. However, this post by, I am assuming, a Sri Lankan via Zambia is great comment and indicates the need for an inclusive dialogue about all the things we share and not just about coloured people v/s white people. Read on.

Neelika Jayawardane's avatarAfrica is a Country (Old Site)


Ashton Kutcher, known for his unusual savvy when it comes to investing in tech companies, and for actually being a presence in those spaces (attending conferences and personally meeting startup founders), must know that many of those technical companies have key employees or founders of South Asian descent. So imagine the surprise of many when Kutcher appeared in ‘brownface’, and offended legions. The Indian diaspora in the US were left asking: “Why is it totally unacceptable to do blackface, but ok to do brown/yellow face in the US?” Even Gawker, known for being on top of the game, posted a somewhat inane take on the issue, taking no particular stance.

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International Women’s Day.

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I wrote this on 8/03/2000, when I lived in India. It was my response to the front page of The Times Of India on that day. Never published it, never showed it to anyone until today. Maybe it is a bit silly and in-your-face but some of those emotions still trouble me. The idea of freedom, a woman’s role in society, her biological and physiological functions and her struggles and acceptance of destiny continue to influence my life and the many decisions I make. Sometimes I feel very empowered and sometimes utterly helpless and weak…

Seven women achievers on the front-page today.

Health, law, education, animal and other rights.

Seven women.

Daughters, sisters, wives, mothers, friends.

So many others like them.

Some educated. Most not.

In high rises, on rail tracks,

In land reserves and brothels.

Servants, slaves, bosses.

Achievers all. Yet, stifled all.

Me, smug in my middle-class existence,

High on education, earnings and ethics, look down

Upon the veiled on.

There she is. Procrastinating, prematurely greying

And so pusillanimous.

Why can’t she stand up for herself?

I have failed the sisterhood.

Shouldn’t even consider the question.

Instead, I should ask, can she help it?

I am her too. Can I help it?

Centuries of suppression and neglect,

Of being an insignificant member of her family.

Malnourished, ill-treated, sold for prostitution,

Scraped at in the womb. Snuffing out her very existence.

Many times meted out by her own mother, grandmother,

Aunt, elder sister.

So why do I deride myself?

This is one of her own. They fail the sisterhood too.

May be.

It is vicarious power.

Can’t rule over men? Hanker after a son.

Keep him tied. Encourage him to beat or burn.

Never teach him to respect other women.

And when they have the capacity, remain selfishly indifferent.

They fail the sisterhood too.

May be not.

A daughter will have to lead the same agonising life.

Enslaved, tortured, suppressed.

Let her go before she actually exists. Before she questions

The system and is raped for doing do.

I often ask God about gender equations, hoping He will answer.

He. God is a man.

But He did / does have a mother right?

It is the men who fail their mothers.

They make the rules, set the limitations.

Whose social function is what.

Who is to wear what, who is to say what.

According to the indiatimes.com poll, figure hugging

Jeans are more provocative than sarees.

Must’ve been loads of men who logged on. Smirking.

Deciding the dress code for women.

All who have failed their mothers.

The other day a man teased me on the road.

Same as happens to so many women.

I was disgusted, then guilty.

May be it was the trousers and jacket?

Should I stop wearing long skirts with slits?

Sleeveless blouses?

Should I cover my arms and legs?

Hijaab. Barely enough to be able to see?

Oil my hair? No make-up, not even lip balm?

Look my little toe can be seen!

Eve tempted Adam!

Swathes won’t tempt him now, neither will a blunted mind.

Aaaargh!

I am asphyxiating, I am blinded, my feet swaddled.

For whom are you celebrating Women’s Day?

Who is celebrating Women’s Day?

A few shopping malls and dotcoms.

Buy gifts for the woman in your life …..today.

As if they don’t matter the rest of the time.

I DON’T WANT THIS.

I may be breaking the glass ceiling but another of

My sisters is being denied existence. One is being

Teased and raped, one is being burnt.

One more sold in the market.

I DON’T WANT THIS.

A lone day to be put on a pedestal and trampled on

On the others.

No. No tokens.

Give me the whole year. Give me my whole life.

Give me choice.

The right to education, to health,

Food, clothes, shelter, clean toilets.

Give me my right to decide.

Love, marriage, children, work.

To move freely-anytime, anywhere.

Breathe uncloistered air. Sweet, unsuppressed, uplifting air.

Let me have all that.

Let me live the way I want to-and I can give back more.

This world exists because of me.

Nature is me.

That koel on the mango tree is me.

The cool, white glow on starry nights is me.

I am warmth and compassion.

The musty fragrance of wet earth now captured and bonded

Give me back my freedom

Let me live the way I want. Let me show you how to live.

Bring On The Dragon!

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drsapna's avatar

Another Lantern Festival comes and goes and New Zealand celebrates Chinese culture in this wonderfully multicultural land. Aren’t we lucky? Just the week before New Zealanders were having a collective seizure over selling the Crafar farms to the Chinese. All is now forgiven in the bonhomie of dragon lanterns and dumplings.

Just the week before, the Labour Party, that party which loves and propagates the presence of ethnics in Aotearoa and vigorously defends our rights for cultural maintenance, suddenly wanted the Crafar Farms to be kept in New Zealand ownership.  Then there is the National Party. Prime Minister John Key has said and reiterated that New Zealand will be welcoming more investment from the Chinese. At the same time converting TVNZ7, a truly public television channel, into a shopping channel. Money and investment from the Chinese is desired but that economic benefit does not translate into equity of representation for the ethnic minorities locally, for the rest of the country to know and understand their stories and cultures and to overcome racist attitudes. The hypocrisy on both sides is obvious, their lip service to multiculturalism. You wonder where the xenophobia comes from? Is the fear of foreign (non-white) investment connected or not connected to how ethnic minorities are perceived and treated in Aotearoa New Zealand?

But then we have events like the Lantern Festival (and Diwali) to give us that connection don’t we? That annual gathering, mixing and mingling of mostly local Chinese and mostly mainstream (white/Pakeha) where everyone sees each other, feels good, eats Chinese food, sings karaoke, watches the fireworks, checks out the imported lanterns and goes home. Until next year. If the aim of such an event is to bring in a zillion footfalls and therein be successful then that is fine. Any B grade movie aimed at the lowest common denominator does just that. It is called mindless entertainment.

Imagine this:  Within the interiors of a HR department:

Two Pakeha read the top page of resumes and throw them in a rubbish bin.

PERSON A :Wong, Leung, Kwok, Kwon, Yik … no, no, no.

PERSON B : Oh you’ve got Asians in your pile too?

PERSON A : Yeah, seriously…no speak Engrrish … I don’t even bother to read through. PERSON B : I know! I just wish someone worthy applied, makes things easy you know … so what did you do over the weekend?

PERSON A: We went to the Lantern Festival. It was so good. I ate so many dumplings and the lanterns they were amazing.

PERSON B : Weren’t they just? I look forward to the Lantern Festival every year. It is so much fun.

PERSON A : My family just love Chinese food. We go to yum char once a month for sure. PERSON B : I love yum char! Which is your favourite yum char place?                                                                                                                     FADE OUT.*

Does multiculturalism, as implemented by governments and related organisations, break barriers via events like the Lantern Festival (and Diwali) or perpetuate the other-isation, exotic-isation and ghetto-isation of ethnic minorities? I would argue that in the larger, multicultural context of this nation, an event like the Lantern Festival is aimless. Like giving popcorn and fizzy drinks to malnourished children so as to feed them but it is not the correct food is it?. Do we learn about Chinese people and Chinese culture at the end of it all? Do we know about their (and by extension other ethnic minorities) contribution to Aotearoa New Zealand?

How many of these visitors are going come away with more knowledge of the local Chinese?

Just another photo op.

Andrew Butcher of the Asia:NZ Foundation says that ”The immediate stuff in our neighbourhood I think that requires a wee bit more work and a wee bit more adjustment.” (In this article on overseas investment figures.) How much is ‘a wee bit more’? Theoretically, if the festivals organised by the Asia:NZ Foundation were meant to change perceptions about Asians, then, in the last ten years since these events began, New Zealanders would want to know about the dumpling-maker rather than just eat the dumplings ya? Unless of course the idea is to exhibit ethnic minorities as anthropological specimens on an annual basis and feel good about how diverse we are.

So, a wee bit more is actually work on a daily basis with everyday cultural existence and behaviour that is normalised and integrated. Not merely teaching Asia in schools or commissioning research that the media reports and forgets. A wee bit more is about the chaos at grassroots level that grows into a movement for sustained, constant visibility and finally acceptance. A wee bit more is empowering minorities and expanding their thinking not just engaging with community leaders and community elites.

Should white people be in charge of showcasing the ethnic minorities of New Zealand? Or teaching Asians about guanxi and how to be Asian or telling young Asians to go on their OE to Asia?  Asia:NZ is white people. (Pardon the English.) Perhaps it is about maintaining colonial, hierarchical power structures to keep ethnics in their place. Is there a wee bit where the ethnics get a say in their representation (minus the dumplings and Bollywood dancing)?

Let us suppose that these festivals are ‘soft power’ projected by New Zealand and packaged with economic incentives for China/India/Asian countries. To attract and persuade them that we are a multicultural nation and we take care of our ethnic minorities. (Look! We celebrate their festivals!) That’s great. We need more trade so why not. Then (a) why fake the concern for the communities and their culture? and (b) if the love for the local ethnics is genuine, is any of that money coming in be going to used to towards creating a robust, egalitarian society that is less racist and not so xenophobic?

Also, for the sake of argument, one can say these festivals are better than nothing. At least we ethnics get a chance to gather and show our culture. Sure. Does that mean (a) we shouldn’t try to improve upon the concept and (b) not question how, our representation, as shaped by white people, remains shallow and superficial? Or how their idea of multiculturalism is about reducing inherent complexities and preserve white supremacy? Where real, existential issues of ethnic minorities are overlooked in the name of cultural maintenance, where the elites from ethnic communities are deemed cultural representatives, where cultural certainty and ‘authenticity’ is the only thing allowed so white people can decide who you are? Multiculturalism which insists on staying static despite changing demographics.

That of course brings up the question of so called community leaders and patriarchs. Who, in most cases, are more interested in photo-ops with the Prime Minister and getting on panels and boards or becoming famous. Maybe these people agreed to the idea of ethnic festivals, to Diwali and the Lantern Festival ten years ago. How about seeking a review? In my experience they would rather be subservient to the government/Asia:NZ as long as their status in the community is maintained.

One way to move is to dismantle the hierarchical structures that insist on representing minorities. Then to rebuild. To separate international trade and business from local celebrations of culture and are yet connected because economic development is common to both. To restructure such as to engage with grassroots, where diversity is not a commodity within the soft power of our nation but a real value, where Asians are in charge of Asian culture, where young Kiwis of Asian origin have a say because this is their future. Asia:NZ is due for a new CEO. Maybe an Asian CEO? Perhaps a complete rehaul?

And for all this ethnic communities have to reflect upon their own place and culture; to break the model minority myth, to build relations with each other even as we work through cultural maintenance and identity, so we have a say in the matters of this nation, to be seen as more than pawns by political parties and the white echelons. Remember what Uncle Bob said? Otherwise,

Most people think, great man will come from Wellington, Make a flash festival and make everybody feel high.…get up stand up…

*sorry for the wrong script format and apologies to my Chinese friends for using their surnames.

Sharing the love.

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http://kiwistargazer.blogspot.com/

I may not have enough time to write one of my ponderous blogs but here is one that I enjoy from time to time. Anjum Rehman has a definite point-of-view and is a wonderful person. More power to you sista!

Getting Back Into Workmode.


This is a real short post, written quick and fast, considering my usual pondering procrastinations that I eventually publish. Every year I tell myself the goal should be to blog about something kickass; that elusive post which will elevate me to the realms of the ‘read and eagerly waiting for more’ category. I could potentially write about what I eat for lunch, my sex/love life, fashion, the Kardashians @_@. Nah. That would mean not taking myself seriously, which I do 🙂
Since I have an opinion on everything and everyone it should be easy to just bang away at the keyboard and produce something. Yeah? Nah. I’m not that cool. (Check this Wiki out.)
Yet there is lots to write about. My favourite topics being of course feminism, rather representation of ethnic women and diasporic Indians. Plus all else in-between. So there are blogs-in-the-making and there are those on hold. Because work comes first and then to find time for my personal life.
For me 2012 has begun on a positive note with many projects happening at the same time. Before all that though, a road trip through the East Coast of New Zealand reminded me once again about my place in the world, about human solidarity, about the importance of land and nature as a common treasure and why I should be grateful for my life. Hence the optimism.
Hopefully whoever reads this understands what I am saying.
Happy new year, Gung Hai Fat Choy. Peace, prosperity and love. Here is to more blogs, well thought out and pertinent. 🙂

Is India Really Calling?


I recently finished reading Anand GiridharadasINDIA CALLING, an intimate portrait of a nation’s remaking. I’d watched Jon Stewart interview Anand on The Daily Show and decided to read the book. Any book on and about India fascinates me. The idea of India as perceived and expressed by the writers more often than not reiterates that India means a billion things to a billion people. Some emotions and concepts overlap and some don’t. Depends on where you come from and where you want to go. So of course I picked up the book from my local library. It is less than 300 pages and should have been an easy read but a lot of the time I would slam it shut in mild irritation. Mild irritation because (a) the descriptions just went on and on as if trying to capture, project and exoticise an imagery for a Western audience already unable to fathom the effects of globalisation on a third world country (b) this was an upper-middle class, slightly condescending, slightly enamoured, male point-of-view.

It does not bother me that Anand is a second generation Indian-American. That was one of the reasons I wanted to read the book. The search for identity and roots is an universal desire amongst migrants and so Anand’s idea to go back to India and rediscover his roots is absolutely valid. Neither is he a bad writer but to condense a complex country and current social churning into India101 is problematic. Especially when there is no critique, only fascination.

I will only bullet-point the following and not necessarily in order.

  • Before anything else, the chapter on Mukesh Ambani is utterly sychophantic. Of course being the richest man in India means people either like you or hate you (and I’m not a fan) but perhaps like in a biopic there might have been some endearing qualities to this man, maybe. Anand has not been able to tell the reader so. Instead he pushes the idea that Mukesh Ambani represents the new India where anyone can become rich. The ‘villager-made-good’ image of Mr Ambani is repeatedly portrayed as if he does not care two hoots about being seen in chappals and pants that begin at his chest. How do you know it is not a deliberate image created to appeal to the common-man Reliance shareholder? And then build an ostentatious tower on allegedly dubiously obtained prime real estate.
  • Then there is Ravindra from Umred. Great story of a lower caste boy who made it big and even went to Hong Kong as team manager for the Indian roller skating team (although I cannot find any reference online). What percentage of the lower castes does he represent? Barely none. Just one ‘success story’ is not a sign of changing India. Is Ravindra now with a political party where he is the token Dalit leader? I am curious. Has he been able to transform his community by empowering them or just made money for his family? While rest of the lower castes continue to be where they are because the new middle class, made of poor people from the upper caste, assert themselves within the schema.
  • The Upstairs and Downstairs chachas from Ludhiana, one who exists in the past and another who looks towards the future are such caricatures. We know, we’ve always known. Such families existed before economic liberalisation and always will. They will be in television serials and in Indian films; they will be in your building in urban Bombay and they will be in some remote small town in the middle of India. My family has specimens like this. It is not a new conflict created in modern India unless it is to sell to Western readers.
  •  Obeisance to neoliberalism comes through in the chapter on the Maoists in Hyderabad. Anand tries hard not be be contemptuous of a ‘part-time’ revolutionary who also writes for The Economic Times but ultimately accuses him of being another Brahmin who will treat the workers/comrades as if from the lower castes. On one hand the book eulogises the contradictions that is India and then goes on to point fingers at a living example of the same. Because a businessman activist who runs an NGO aimed at social justice is more kosher than a middle class man who is trying to pay the bills and create awareness of a different kind? Thomas Friedman v/s Karl Marx scenario. Depends on who makes the inference. In this case it is Anand Giridharadas.

The book pretty much retells bits and pieces of Indian history for a Western reader but stays clear of the uncomfortable. Where is the Hindu-Muslim conflict? Why not a single Muslim minority person who might have possibly gained from economic liberalisation? What about the Hindu fundamentalists? Farmers who own and till their own land, frustrated at global cotton prices and helpless because of the free-market policies in India?

Anand tells his grandfather’s story, of marrying a young girl and working for Hindustan Lever, of old school cultural values. Very touching and beautiful. My grandfather grew up in poverty and was the first from his family to have higher education-to become a doctor. He too had very old school cultural values. Honesty, modesty, frugality, hardwork, social responsibility and all that. In his book Anand somehow interprets these as British values that do no fit Indian culture anymore because as India has become richer Indians have gone back to their ‘real’ culture. Manu’s culture; that ‘we-are-like-this-only’ and so everything is relative and subjective. A low caste man commiting a crime deserves to be punished whereas a Brahmin not so. (I have over simplified it here rather than get into a deeper discussion.) So all the above values as subscribed to by our grandparents are alien. That means, as I interpret it, Indians can get away with a lot of bad behaviour and continued lack of repsonsibility towards the world because of some ancient patriarch whose words suit our existence. Or is it that while money is great and greed too, there is no need to apologise about it because the scriptures say so? How convenient. That leaves no space for public discourse at all. Except to blame the government and politicians for every bad thing.

The only three things Anand has observed perfectly are the (a) attitude of the upper middle class South Bombay types who live in posh localities and frequent the posher clubs (or gymkhanas), (b) the modern Indian woman. My dear sisters from back home. Nothing changes there and (c) the lack of a liberal arts education that allows one to think tangentially.

I know this blog is already too long but I do want to use two films as examples of pinpointing the changes in India; to see how Indians negotiate modernity and tradition.

Karan Johar’s 1998 film Kuch Kuch Hota Hai showed us young Indians who lived in their designer gear, played basketball, called each other dude, travelled the world (in the space of the songs) and were at ease with themselves. They had no desire to question tradition and culture, in fact that is where they anchored themselves. Elders were not challenged, there was no sign of defiance, resistance or protest. It was all about the family, love and maintaining status quo. More than ten years later, Imtiaz Ali‘s film Rockstar has an angry, defiant young man as the protagonist. He is unable to express himself, does not know how to do it. His girlfriend gets married without understanding the meaning of it (as do many young Indians) and then the real love story begins. An extra-marital relationship that is fraught with guilt and the inability to escape from what is. There are questions galore, directed to family, to society, to tradition but no words to articulate. (Except through the song Sadda Haq.)  In the end both die. That is the impact of globalisation without social discourse. It has speeded up the way Youngistan is discarding ‘old ways’ but without any bulwark of references (should I say foundation). This is unprecedented. The older generation, even those in their forties, who grew up in a socialist India that then transformed into a free market India in the early nineties, what I call the ‘lost generation’, is still to comprehend the changes. So where is that leading to? Backwards. Because when we cannot make sense of what is going on we look to the ‘golden’ past, to religion and the scriptures, imagining and hoping to find safety there.

At best Anand’s book is a collection of his personal expriences and observations as he tries to figure out his ‘Indian identity’ and at worst it is a form of Orientalism I have not yet been able to name. It would be problematic if the book became the definitive text about social and cultural life in free market India.

My Urban Gardening # 5 thereabouts.


While I procrastinate about how best to write my next post-it is half written-summer is here with a vengeance. Although it rains in the mornings, they say in this part of the world, it is hot as the rest of the day. I had my first swim in the Pacific Ocean some weeks ago but have yet to go in after that. Meanwhile my garden flourishes. This year I have done away with the chilli and eggplant. I have in my little balcony at the back a long pot of strawberry, spinach, cherry tomatoes red and yellow, broad beans, red guava and lime. This year I have vodoo-ed the pots. So the aphids, the fungal gnats, the ants and assorted summer pests are afraid to come anywhere close. So far so good.

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This year I planted seeds I had harvested from my lemon basil and tulsi. Little pots on my kitchen window sill, protected from the fiercely cold Auckland wind but allowing plenty of sun. It is a miracle when seeds, coaxed and chatted to, germinate and grow then become robust plants. This is my family, these plants. I’ve got blood and bones liquid to feed them too. Yeah it seems squeamish-to feed human/animal stuff to plants and then think of them as ‘vegetarian’. But then I wonder how vegetables are grown in bulk without feeding them (or enhancing growth, if that is the agri-market-speak). Better blood and bones than mineral depleting chemical fertilisers. As long as my plants are happy and I can go out the back door to cut some chives/coriander/spinach/basil/pick tomatoes even while I cook. Yeah, this summer is going well so far with my plant family. I just need to loosen the soil and repot some. And I do seem to getting better at gardening. From never having tried back in Bombay to making sure it on my list of things-to-do-always, kind of like meditation. That’s all.